Getting Even, Getting Along

Retaliating and Loving Your Enemies…

S - Scripture

Matthew 5:38-48

38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’ 39 But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. 40 And if anyone would sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. 41 And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. 42 Give to the one who begs from you, and do not refuse the one who would borrow from you.

43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ 44 But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. 46 For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? 47 And if you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? 48 You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

O - Observation

seems pretty straight forward in the beginning of verse 38 - if someone does something bad to you, you should get them back; Jesus, on the other hand, tells you to go a step further - turn your cheek to get hit on the other side, give them more than they stole the first time, go twice as far as you were told to do so. fast forward to verse 43, Jesus, again, flips the script - He tells us to love our enemies, and also to pray for those who persecute us. if you are a non-believer in Jesus, really who in their right mind would and feels good doing so. i know i wouldn’t and would want to do the very thing the first part of verses 38 & 43 mentions.

what was retaliation during biblical times (summation provided by Grok):

there was a law, lex talionis, whose intent is to limit vengeance - ensuring that the punishment was proportionate to the offense, hoping to reduce increasing cycles of revenge; though, in reality, it was often used to justify personal retaliation.

does this mean we should just simply let someone steamroll us, possibly even hurting us further and more; that we should “take it like a man” and do nothing? almost. Jesus basically taught us a way to handle ourselves in the midst of these attacks. He instructs us to not “get even” as the world tells us, and instead practice being loving and forgiving. what we do know is that He is not saying we should only be passive when something bad/evil happens or not to defend ourselves in every circumstance, but rather we should come with a heart that wants to break the cycle of getting “nuts” and revenge. this “crazy, out-of-the-box” treatment teaches one to focus and affirm being humble, patient, and trusting in God’s justice rather than trying to handle things in our own way. this really challenges our natural instinct to respond and reciprocate and instead Jesus models a countercultural response that reflects God’s character.

A - Application

there is always room for improvement - the way i speak to someone who has pissed me off, borderline want to kick the snot out of; treating that person fairly without speaking poorly of them; wanting to see them be blessed instead of blasting them (thank you pastor allen cardines - nanaikapono church for that lesson); that the outcome is right for everyone involved. one thing that i take from this area of growth in my life is that my shitty thinking did not honor God, did not show the love of Christ, did not embody how a Christian should carry themself, and certainly did not draw others to Jesus. frankly, this is a pretty sucky way to live.

i certainly have learned a lot in the past couple of decades why not retaliating and loving your enemy is so important. it would easily be said that i was that person who did not deserve the same and that if something bad were to happen to me, i completely had it coming to me. it has been a great lesson to learn as it begins to change yourself internally (emotionally, mentally, spiritually), soften your heart, knowing that you have been forgiven when you absolutely deserved punishment (mercy); all the while my family and i had been taken care of, provided for, showered with love (grace). when you recognize the unmerited favor, how can you continue being a mean, hard-hearted, dickhead that no one can stand to be with and around?

P - Prayer

dear Heavenly Father, i was once that person seeking to get even for those who wronged me - whether in my thoughts, words, and even actions. thank you for changing my poor attitude and thinking. i recognize that i deserved to get cracks, instead you replaced it with unconditional love and showed me there is a better way to handle difficult situations and people. teach me to forgive and love unconditionally as i have received both when i was living far from that example. please help me to be mindful of the words i speak so that i can bridge gaps, take things down a notch or two when conversations get heated, to speak life and peace into others where they want to know, and that they will see, you Lord Jesus. in your glorious and wonderful name i pray, amen!